Wednesday, September 21, 2011

The Importance of Interpreting Offensive Statements As If We Had Said Them

None of us can avoid saying things occasionally in a way / wording that sounds different than we mean it. All of us are going to be misunderstood at some point, and it's going to happen to most of us over and over again - sometimes when we can find out about it and correct the misunderstanding, but often when we never realized we've been misunderstood and can't correct it.

Therefore, when I hear something that seems offensive at first, I try to see if there is a way to interpret what is being said so that it's not offensive - so there's something I can learn from it. Sometimes, what is said really is just offensive, but generally I can find a way to take something positive from it.


Unknown said...

I like what you say for two reasons. One, that often people don't mean it in the way you take it at first, or if they do, it's because of a mistaken perspective. Hardly ever (I think) are people purposefully maliceful (that's not a word!) Full of malice.

Second, I really do believe what Brigham Young had to say; that he who takes offense when it isn't meant is a fool, and he who takes offense when it is meant is an even greater fool. Because he's right... why lower yourself by taking the offense, when you can reach out to somebody and figure out what it is that's causing the clash? Terry Warner has a lot of great stuff to say on that, too.

Mama D said...

You are so good at doing this. I am grateful to learn from a master. :)

Gwennaƫlle said...

I am not often offended by what people say when it is aimed at me. I am when it as aimed at people who can't defend themselves and I see that it is hurting them.