Don't Avoid Life's Scars

"Maybe life isn't about avoiding the bruises. Maybe it's about collecting the scars to prove we showed up."

I came across the quote above today and immediately thought of the temple. Overall, I can say I enjoy serving in the temple greatly, but I recognize that there are bruises and scars for many who attend. 
My favorite aspect of the endowment is that you don't have to say or do anything from memory. Even if you forget everything completely, there always is someone to help you complete the play and enter the presence of the Lord. If you start and stay, you succeed. Every.Time.No.Exceptions. 
I admire those who collect scars and continue to show up, whether that is in the temple or any other aspect of life. I admire them more than they generally know, and I want to say that clearly and directly to so many of you whom I am blessed to call friends. 
God bless you for your perseverance as you collect your scars.

The Idea That We Earn Spiritual Grades Is Abhorrent to Me

I have a friend who is bi-polar and who has struggled for years with the tendency to compare herself to others.  "Objective" measures of righteousness (and I use the quotation marks intentionally in phrasing it that way) and discussion of The Plan of Happiness have been brutally hard for her to handle, especially in her depressive stages.  While we talking recently, she mentioned how difficult it was for her to hear a friend say that we earn a spiritual grade and that only those who earn an "A" will reach the Celestial Kingdom.

The following is my response to that belief: 

If that idea works for someone else, fine - but the only standard in the actual theology is doing what we are able to do, with the assurance that the Atonement makes up the difference. I don't like talking about spirituality in terms of grades in school, but I believe if someone is capable of getting a "D" and actually gets that "D" that person will be rewarded to the exact same degree as someone who is capable of getting an "A" and actually gets an "A" - and more than someone who is capable of getting an "A" but gets a "B". I taught school for a while, and I was far prouder of the "Most Improved" student in my classes than I was with the bright students who coasted to straight "A"s without any attempt to stretch themselves.  (The parable of the talents also comes to mind.)
 
I have twin sisters, a year younger than I.  The other six of us got A's and A-'s, while those two struggled to get B's and an occasional A and C.  I learned later that some of their teachers assumed their B's and C's were the result of lack of effort, since none of their brothers and sisters got those grades.  In reality, my sisters worked MUCH harder than the rest of us in school - and they are two of the hardest workers still to this day whom I know.  To say, in any way, that the rest of us will be rewarded above them is abhorrent to me. 

Nobody knows fully what someone else can do. We don't know fully even what we can do. We just have to try to do our best, whatever that is, and try not to let others' expectations weigh on us - particularly those who are bi-polar or prone to depression of any kind. They need to work on maintaining a handle on that tendency, to the best they can, knowing the hand they were dealt is different than those who talk of earning spiritual grades.

The people who talk about spiritual grades generally care; they just don't understand.

It's important to remember that. They really do care; they just don't understand.

Dealing with the Storms of Life: I Hope We Dance

I heard a somewhat cheesy statement years ago, one that perhaps everyone else here has heard already, but I came across it again today and thought I should share it here:

Life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass.  It's about learning to dance in the rain.

When we are going through a "crisis" or "transition" or "trial" of any kind (a "storm of life"), we can rail against the causes of those storms - or we can figure out how to dance in the rain. 

How each of us dances will vary as much as dances vary in the world.  In fact, I dare say there are as many kinds of unique dances than there are unique kinds of storms.  "Enduring" doesn't have to mean "looking down and plodding forward"; it also means "lasting" - as in "enduring love".  

Storms drench those who are not sheltered while the rain falls, but storms also cleanse and clean and purify and provide nourishment.  If we can see what we experience as much in terms of "cleansing, nourishing rain" as we do in terms of a "refiner's fire" (understanding there are both, and not all trials burn as they cleanse - that some are meant to wash things away), we can begin to identify those situations that burn and those situations in which it is possible to dance. 

I hope, as much as possible, we choose to dance.

The Gospel Is Simple; Life in a Community Is Not

The Gospel really is simple - not easy, but simple: 

Jesus is the personification of the will of God to allow for the ultimate growth of His children (Atonement); hope for, believe in and act on the promises of the Lord, even if you can't see the results at the time (faith); try to change - both reactively to mistakes you make and proactively to become who you want to become (repent); symbolically participate in a spiritual cleansing ritual (be baptized); "receive" comfort and guidance from God (the gift of the Holy Ghost); rinse and repeat your entire life (endure to the end).

On the other hand, living life amid the necessary rules and regulations of communal living is neither simple nor easy, especially, in the imagery of Joseph B. Wirthlin, for those who play a different instrument than most others in the community and/or hear a counter-melody or harmony most others don't hear. 

The Key to Internal Peace and Joy: A Short Thought

Even if people view many things differently, the core Gospel principles (LOVE; belief in the unseen but hoped; self-reflective change; symbolic cleansing; striving to recognize the promptings / will of the divine; never giving up) are universal.

Understanding and living by those simple principles, according to the dictates of our own individual consciences, really is the key to internal peace and joy. 

When that is coupled with a collective acceptance that ALL people have that same privilege to craft their own internal peace and joy (subject to minimal restrictions, based on the fundamental principle of love), again, even if they view many things differently - in those cases, "Zion" truly exists.

Being an Instrument of Change: Differing Scriptural Examples and Our Personal Responsibilities

Many people have asked me what they need to do to be an instrument of positive change in their sphere of influence.  My response is very simple:

We need to do the best we can, regardless of the outcome we expect or for which we merely hope. Period.

We have to be willing to work for change even if we believe it won't happen.  Changing the world, even on a small scale, requires a degree of faith that change can happen.  Sometimes, it happens; sometimes it doesn't; either way, we have to be willing to try. 

The best examples of this in the Book of Mormon are the Alma, the Younger, and the sons of Mosiah, who succeeded far beyond anyone's expectations - and, conversely, the general, Mormon, leading his people out of love for them even though he had absolutely no hope that they would repent and watching them get slaughtered. In the Bible, it might be Elijah - who preached for years and only saw one conversion.  We aren't in such a radical, bleak situation - and we might just have a Jonah experience where people we assumed were too hard-hearted to repent actually do repent. (which, btw, is what I beleive to be the main point of that story - that even the very wicked can change, and we shouldn't begrudge them that change or think we are better than they are just because of their wickedness, since we might have no idea the cause of that wickedness and their ability to repent) 

We can't serve only in situations where we reasonably can expect great results - at least not if our objective is to make radical changes on a (relatively) broad scale.  Being effective has its place, and it is an important place, but calculations of effectiveness rob of us the opportunity to make a real, widespread difference in the world - again, no matter how broadly we define that world.  

Avoiding Becoming Weary (or Burned Out) in the LDS Church

In his wonderful talk, "Concern for the One", Elder Wirthlin mentioned that some people stop coming to church and become "lost" because they are weary.  I was struck by that when he said it, and I have thought a lot about it since then - as anyone knows who has read this blog for some time, since I reference that talk quite often.

I want to share how I avoid becoming weary in the way that Elder Wirthlin describes, and I want to use my situation while living in Missouri specifically because it highlights how I easily could have become weary - or "burned out", as one friend described his experience to me years ago.

1) I keep from getting burned out by limiting what I do to what I can do without getting burned out. I know that sounds a bit silly and obvious (and very difficult for many, given the assumptions held my some members), but it works for me. It "helped" in Missouri that our finances and distance from the church created automatic barriers to doing too much, but I held to the principle even when we used to live 1.5 miles from the church and I made plenty of money. Bottom line: It's a hard-core commitment I've made - to do as much as I can but not get burned out by trying to do too much - to not try to do everything.

Some people don't like that I do that, and some people don't get it, but most people (the large majority) really do understand.

2) Having said that, I am MUCH more open to making an exception for unique service opportunities than for "regular, run-of-the-mill" stuff. I couldn't drive 40 minutes there and 40 minutes back - and pay for the gas to do so - just to be involved in an activity where there are plenty of other people there to handle it. Financially, I just couldn't. However, I could do that - occasionally - to help someone who needed my individual help. I could do that largely because I wasn't doing all the other stuff that would have sapped my time and money and energy - and that's really, really important to understand.

It's a balancing act, and it's MUCH harder in many ways than trying to do everything - but I believe it's important to be the one doing the acting and not just be acted upon.

Sunday School Lesson Recap: The Meaning and Purpose of the First Principles & Ordiances as Commandments

The lesson yesterday focused on the meaning and purpose of the first principles and ordinances of the Gospel when viewed as commandments: faith (in the Lord, Jesus Christ); repentance, baptism, the gift of the Holy Ghost, and enduring to the end.

As we have done each week this month, we defined each commandment, talked more in-depth about what each commandment means beyond just a simple definition, and ended with a discussion of the purpose of each one - the "why" of each commandment.

1) Faith

Definition: From Hebrews 11:1 - "the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen"

Meaning: "Substance" means "the actual matter of a thing, as opposed to the appearance or shadow; reality" - or, in the footnote to Hebrews 11:1 from the Greek, "assurance, basis, foundation". "Evidence" means "indication; manifestation; proof". Thus, "faith" means the details of that for which someone hopes but can't see and the indications or proof they see that supports those hopes.

Purpose: We talked about scientific experiments and how they are built on the pattern recorded in Alma 32 and described in Hebrews 11 - how faith is hoping something enough to conduct some kind of experiment in order to gain evidence of some kind that supports the hope. We talked about how diverse such hopes can be, as well as how diverse such evidence can be, but I emphasized that faith disappears when knowledge is found - and how that is much easier in the realm of scientific experiment than spiritual experiment, since spiritual "evidence" can be so subjective and non-reliable in terms of replicability. That's why spiritual faith must be gained individually - and why individual faith differences need to be accepted, respected and honored.

We talked about Alma 32 and the statement that there are two groups of blessed people: those who are compelled to be humble and those who humble themselves without being compelled. We talked about how that applies to faith, as well. I used Mother Teresa as an example, especially since she said shortly before her death that she had prayed fervently for a special witness from God that he existed and approved of her life and never received it. She said she saw God's love all around her (seeing evidence for her hope) had not seen the actual object of her hope. I told the students that I don't know of a better example of faith than Mother Teresa, including those within our own Mormon heritage who I see as equal to her in that regard.

We then discussed how lack of faith (in any area, scientific, spiritual, emotional, inter-personal, etc.) closes minds and stops progress - because such lack stops us from seeking understanding we don't possess currently or naturally. We talked about faith in the context of statements like, "Study it out in your mind and in your heart," and, "Seek ye out of the best books . . ." and Joseph Smith's statement that Mormonism embraces all truth, no matter the source. The purpose of faith isn't to believe any particular thing; it is to keep our minds and hearts open to learn every true thing. We need to be open to changing understanding / further light and knowledge by always hoping to continue to see evidence for things we can't see currently.

2) Repentance

Definition: "change"

Meaning: openness to change, in any way that leads us closer to being more Christ-like / godly - We talked about (my own terms) "reactive repentance" - making mistakes and trying to stop doing them - and "proactive repentance" - seeking to develop godly characteristics to become more Christ-like / godly. We talked about the difference between extremely serious and/or habitual sins that require a "steps of repentance" process and, in some cases ("thorns of the flesh"), suppression and regular, run-of-the-mill sins that can be eliminated best by becoming someone who simply doesn't commit them anymore. I told them that God isn't God because of His ability to suppress bad or inappropriate "natural" inclinations; he is God because he is someone who doesn't have those inclinations. We talked about the danger of attempts to suppress and equating Godhood with nothing more than extreme self-control - that becoming like God is less of a "battle" or "victory" and more of a process of change - a "repenting", in the purest sense of the word.

Purpose: to move from an animalistic nature to a divine nature - One of the students said something that I thought was profound. She said that repentance is an attempt to "find and become my best self". (It's moments like that when I have faith that what I'm teaching is making a difference.)

I asked the students why faith is a pre-condition to repentance, and they got it - that we won't try to change unless we have hope that our efforts will allow us to change. We can't see future changes in ourselves for which we hope, but we can see others who have changed - or feel assurance that we can change.

3) Baptism

Definition: originally, "immersion".

Meaning: symbolic cleansing - a statement of intent to be purified

Purpose: I asked why we teach the need for baptism in this life when people can be exalted without having been baptized in this life. In other words, if it's not necessary for anyone who has died without it, what is its purpose? We talked about that for a while, and we settled eventually on the need to have a communal expression of our commitment to repent - to change. In other words, baptism is our way of testifying openly to each other and to God that we have faith and are willing to repent. I told them that I believe in the power of such expressions when they involved the whole soul in some real, tangible way.

4) The Gift of the Holy Ghost

Definition: a bestowal or present of the Holy Ghost

Meaning: ideally, being in tune with God in such a way that communication is possible, in whatever form that takes

Purpose: We talked extensively about this, and the conclusion was that completely open communication channels with God are intended to allow us to get to know God well enough to be helped in our efforts to become like God. In the context of faith, repentance and baptism, the gift of the Holy Ghost is what allows us to see the evidence we desire to validate our hope, make the changes necessary to become whom we hope to become and make our baptismal covenant active and powerful in a real way. It's God's part of the contract, if you will - God's baptismal gift to us to help us succeed and become whom we want to become.

5) Enduring to the End

Definition: never stopping until the end; finishing

Meaning: Becoming perfect ("complete, whole, fully developed") - We talked about "the end" not being death, given the nature of our belief in eternal progression, but rather the point at which we are complete, whole and fully developed - whenever that occurs. It means becoming gods - the ultimate goal of faith in the Lord, Jesus Christ.

I told them about the temple wording of "one eternal round" - and I told them that I personally see enduring to the end as the eternal round that happens when faith, repentance, baptism, the gift of the Holy Ghost work together as one process - when something previously unseen finally is seen and moved from faith to knowledge only to be replaced by new faith in something yet unseen - repeated ad infinitum until, throughout all eternity, everything is seen.

I ended by telling them about my father's death the previous day and how grateful I am that I was raised to be able to say:

"Forever's in my heart and in my blood."

Of Purer Hands and Cleaner Hearts: The Mormon Concept of Soul

First, I want to thank everyone for their thoughts last weekend as I began to contemplate my New Year's Resolution for this month:

Have a purer heart and cleaner hands, and project more the image of God.  

As I read the comments from my initial resolutions post this month, the thought struck me that this resolution symbolizes the Mormon concept of the soul - and the Biblical concept of serving God with one's whole soul.

In Mormonism, the "soul" is seen as the combination of an immortal spirit and a mortal body - and, after the resurrection, we believe both of those "soul" elements will be immortal.  That is the first step to becoming like God - receiving his "image" immortally in the sense that our soul will never be "split" again.  We were created "in the beginning" of our mortal existence in His image in that very literal sense - having our physical bodies "spirit-breathed", if you will, and filled with / animated by our immortal spirit - thus, as Genesis says, becoming a "living soul". Exact appearance doesn't matter all that much to me; it is the concept of clothing a spirit with a body that is the key. 

That unique combination of mortal body and immortal spirit child of God is what allows us to project the image of God at the most fundamental level - and those two aspects of our "soulness" are typically described in terms of our hands and our hearts.  Our hands symbolize what we DO - the acts of our bodies, while our hearts symbolize what we FEEL - the inclinations of our spirits.  Thus, we are in complete harmony with God only when our hands DO the will of God and our hearts FEEL the influence of God. 

Next, "pure" and "clean" both mean "without stain" - and when the condition of purity and cleanliness is extended forward without end ("eternally") it means one is "incorruptible" or "unable to be stained".  Since all of us are sinners and come short of the glory of God, having pure hands and a clean heart is our ultimate goal as to the condition of our soul - meaning we have a "godly soul".  To come full circle in this post, it means we have the image of God "engraven" upon our countenance - not necessarily that we "look like God" in any particular way, but that God has carved us into something that actually has become like Him.  In a very real sense, this process is like the process of taking a block of stone and carving it into a statue - the only difference being that this "engraving" is of a "living sacrifice" of hands and heart - of a whole soul. 

I intend to delve more into each aspect of hands and heart in the next two weeks, but I wanted first to talk of what has struck me regarding what it might mean to "receive his image in your countenance" at a deeper level than merely an outward appearance.  I wanted to talk of an inward metamorphosis generated by an actual engraving process. Most importantly, I want to highlight the way the verse in Alma 5 is worded:

Have ye RECEIVED his image in your countenance?  

God will do the engraving, but it is up to us to receive the engraving that will occur IN our countenances.  Like Joseph Smith's description of being a rough stone rolling, we too must endure the engraver's blows if we are to have His image engraven into our countenances. 

Charity Endureth All Things: Even Others' Different Understanding of Joy

I believe you can tell more about people (both inside and outside the Church) by how they deal with the joy others find outside their own organization (or with differing perspectives that bring joy inside their own organization) than perhaps by any other criterion. One type of person lacks internal joy, constantly finds fault with the joy of others and actively seeks to undercut that joy; another type is secure in her joy and not interested in the differing joy of others; the final type accepts and embraces the idea that others have their own degree of joy - and tries to add to it (and, through it, add to their own joy) whenever possible.

I don’t want to argue with the healthy and happy; I want to learn from them. I want to spend most of my time administering joy to the sick and searching.

How does this relate to charity enduring all things? 

I have learned over the course of my life that there is an element of "enduring" things that don't make sense initially - like the idea that others can find great joy and peace and contentment and fulfillment and progress outside of the Restored Gospel - or even outside Christianity itself.  When someone believes something passionately, especially when there is a degree of exclusivity to their perspective (as there is in my own), it is very easy to form the opinion that "true joy" exists only within that perspective and those beliefs - to devalue others' joy as counterfeit or substandard in some way.  This occurs largely because it's hard to see others' joy and not feel like one's own perspective and beliefs are compromised in some way. 

I personally believe that the opposite it true from within what I would call the "pure Mormon" perspective.  Pure Mormonism says things like, "Learn ye out of the best books" - "Seek wisdom and learning" - "Bring all your good with you and let us add to it" (which implies there is good elsewhere we need, as well, but too many members don't stop and think about that) - "There must needs be opposition in ALL things" (which would include the Church itself, and "opposition" in that section cannot mean people) - "The glory of God is intelligence, or in other words, light and truth" - and so many more.  Pure Mormonism grants that others truly can find joy outside of the LDS Church, since it embraces truth wherever it may be.  Pure Mormonism posits that anyone can be saved and exalted regardless of the specifics of their religious beliefs and faith.  Pure Mormonism is charitable in that sense - in that it "endureth" (continues, exists) without condemning different viewpoints and belief structures as automatically leading others to Hell. 

Individual members too often forget that and slip into a more Protestant attitude with regard to the beliefs of others, but charity enduring all things includes, I believe, the existence of joy outside "our own" - and, in the ideal, learns from it and incorporates it freely and willingly.

My Most Challenging New Year's Resolution Thus Far - To Define "Endure" Properly

At the beginning of the year, when I wrote my New Year's Resolution post, I realized that this month's resolution would difficult to define properly - at least, to define in such a way that I believed would be both practical and acceptable to me personally.  This was because I do NOT want to pray for or request additional things to "endure" in my life, since, as one of my favorite scriptures says in Matthew 6:34:

Sufficient unto the day is the evil thereof.

 

I have enough things to "endure" that I don't need more - and, yet, 1 Corinthians 13:7 does say that charity "endureth all things". 

For this initial post, I want to share just one thing that hit me as I contemplated this dilemma:

1) When I looked at the various definitions of "endure", one in particular caught my eye - particularly as it relates to the idea of charity enduring all things.  It was, quite simply:

to continue to exist or last 

What hit me in this definition is that there is not hint of negativity or "struggle" or suffering inherent in or necessary to continuing to exist or last.  In other words, "endureth all things" does not have to be about increased pain or heavier burdens.  It can be nothing more than the idea expresed in Pslams 119:112:

I have inclined mine heart to perform thy statutes alway, even unto the end.

Translated into the context of my New Year's Resolution, it would read:

I have inclined mine heart to act in the ways outlined in the previous descriptions of charity alway (to internalize charity so that it will become a "natural" part of my very character), even unto the end.

 

In other words, perhaps the idea of charity enduring all things is more of a qualitative, longitudinal statement than it is a quantitative measurement.  Perhaps it relates more to the statment that "God is love" - and the idea that we should strive to emulate and become like Him - than to the idea that the amount of our suffering is more important than how we deal with whatever we are given to endure.  Perhaps enduring ALL things inlcudes blessings and things for which we naturally are grateful - since they also can change us and take us away from charity, if we allow them to do so.  Most importantly, perhaps, is the idea that there is an element of conscious choice in this type of character development - that I can choose to "incline my heart" to react in a charitable way.

I have come to believe that "enduring more things" (as an initial step toward enduring all things) is a perfect concluding resolution for this year.