Wednesday, May 23, 2012

A Profound Experience about the Difference between Approaching Religion through Faith and Fear

A friend once shared the following with me.  I thought it was incredibly profound, so I saved it.  I came across it tonight, and I had the thought that I should share it here.  I hope it helps someone, somehow: 

For years, my Mormonism revolved around fear. Fear of losing my family, fear of being unacceptable, fear of rejection, fear of being unworthy, fear of my sexual impulses, fear, fear, fear to the core.

About a year ago, I realized that was no way to live. I began to live out of faith in God's goodness.

But I never extended that faith to the God of Mormonism. I assumed He was still what I'd always thought Him to be: scary, strict, demanding, unforgiving. He wasn't good. He was a distant stake president on a cloud somewhere who cared about me the way I assume my stake president does -- theoretically, not personally; out of obligation, not sincerity.

I had a long conversation with a good friend this afternoon and she asked:

"Have you ever lived Mormonism out of faith?"
The answer is:

"No, I don't think I have. I've never lived Mormonism out of faith in God's goodness."

I'm left wondering: what does Mormonism looks like when it's filtered through the lens of a loving God, not a punitive one? I've decided to give it a try. I have a feeling I might discover a very different religion than the one I rejected.

And I think it's the only way to give it a real shot.


Gwennaëlle said...

This is what I have discovered through my excommunication and through my coming back.
There was a huge gap between what I felt and the little I knew about my Heavenly Father and the mormon God. I wanted to fight with this unfair guy who was giving contradicting orders and having impossible expectations.

Then I found out that the mormons have everything and more to know our Heavenly Father but they turn it into something often evil and destructive which is one of Satan's greatest accomplishment. Congratulation man.

Right now (since you're reading my blog) I see how and why as I have said in the past "god" is a title or a calling not who is He. It is a part of Him like Aïkido is a part of me and like teaching RS is a part of me but you know me differently and this is what He wants us to know about Him too. What makes Him sad, what makes Him laugh and specially WHY, why in the world He loves us when Satan tells us there is no reason why He should.

wage slave said...

Many of the LDS people I know are rule freaks. Obey all the rules and you'll go to heaven.

Welcome to mortality, AKA love school. Love is the point, not rules. The intent of the rules is to protect you, but if you fall short the atonement has your back.

Forgiveness, letting go, the beatitudes, it's all about the love. Treating the most obnoxious people as if they were Christ, because they are. Love is the answer, like the hippies said but you don't need LSD to know that. The gift of the Holy Ghost is our LSD.

Anonymous said...

I think these perceptions free us to be obedient in a totally new way. The universe is unfolding as it should, and mostly it's nothing personal. I love the idea that I can choose to do those things that draw me into a greater and more intimate relationship with the Creator of the universe.