Grace and Charity: We Hurt Others As Much As Others Hurt Us

We are told that only God can judge our actions based on our understanding, our ability and the intent of our hearts, but that grand grace gets lost in translation at the individual level far too often.

We tend to be hardest in that regard (judging others) on those who are the closest to us, since we think we know them well enough to judge them righteously - and since our expectations are higher for them.

Think about it:

Whose lack of understanding hurts the most - and who is the most hurt by your differences with them?

I'm betting it's family, close friends and fellow congregants. It's easy to love someone, in theory and at the strictly intellectual or emotional level, if they are removed enough to not hurt you.

On the other hand, it's a lot easier to forgive someone for their view of you if you realize how hard it is for them to understand and accept your different views, beliefs and actions.

It's easy to focus on the hurt we feel and forget the hurt we cause others to feel.  I believe recognizing the hurt we inflict, usually unintentionally, is critical to obtaining true charity.