Spiritual Prescriptions

My mother has a rare form of schizophrenia. When she overextends herself, her brain simply refuses to shut down - like a computer that freezes up and won't shut down unless someone unplugs the power. She took "sleeping pills" for years, we thought, but they actually functioned as a shut-down mechanism.

Everyone who has met my mother sees her as a spiritual giant, perhaps the closest things to pure love incarnate they have met. That was true for nearly forty years as she raised 8 children, specifically because my father took on all of the "normal" responsibilities of both parents so that his wife could "be herself". My mother literally goes crazy if she worries about things that she can't control, so my father shouldered the burden of EVERYTHING to shield her from that worry. (I wrote more extensively about this in the post "My Niece Died This Morning".)

I realize now that my father was the spiritual equal of my mother - and that what he taught me about forgiveness and acceptance and withholding judgment (my formative paradigm) was influenced immeasurably by the insight he gained from loving someone who was such a combination of extremes. My "who cares about the peripheral issues" and "focus on the basics" mindset comes from his reconciliation of the divinely sweet woman he married and the monster she became after the birth of my twin sisters - her first breakdown.

This world is full of good and bad, and each of us, as a part of this world, is complicit in that condition. What matters is not that the combination exists; what matters is the "medication" we take to suppress or eliminate the bad and let the good shine. If that means ignoring the bad completely for some, then so be it. Far be it for me to dredge it up and force them to consider what might destroy their peace of mind and cause a breakdown. If it means deep and difficult contemplation and reconciliation, then so be it. Far be it for me to take away that potential path of resolution. If it means actual, pharmaceutical medication, legally prescribed, then so be it. Far be it for me to discourage that kind of resolution by stigmatizing its use. The best thing I can do for someone is to allow them to reconcile what they see as difficult in whatever way works for them; the worst thing I can do is insist that my way is the right way for everyone.

ADDITIONAL NOTE & REQUEST:

The first comment asks for input and help dealing with a family member who has been diagnosed with bi-polar disorder. Anyone who reads this and has experience with bi-polar disorder (or schizophrenia or any other condition that might fit her description), please share any advice you can provide.