They Knew Not Jesus in This Life

I have heard various people of other denominations and religions say they have a problem with the belief that Jesus is the “only way” to achieve happiness in this life and exaltation in the life to come. I believe this is due to a fundamental misunderstanding of what the verses that teach this mean.

I always have interpreted that teaching to mean that the GOSPEL of Jesus Christ is the only way - which I take to mean the principles He taught and the end result of those principles, spelled out in the Sermon on the Mount and encapsulated in Matthew 5:48, Romans 8:17 and other passages in the Bible. That's the only interpretation that makes sense to me in light of perhaps the most fundamental reason for the Restoration - the need to re-establish the universal power of the Atonement of Jesus Christ that Paul taught so clearly in 1 Corinthians 15 - especially verses 21-22.

I believe that is why we can say that those of other religions who live according to those principles can be saved and exalted just as Christians in this life can be - that they lived according to the principles of the Gospel and the light of Christ they brought with them to this earth, even though they "knew not Christ in this life".

A Beautiful Essay on Motherhood and Civil Freedom

Free Day - Serena Davidson (Mormon Momma)

The Power of Worshipful Communion

We talk about individual conversion, but interestingly, the single best indicator of future baptism that has been identified in our stake is Sacrament Meeting attendance. It isn't referral source or "strong witness of the Book of Mormon" or answer to prayer - but Sacrament Meeting attendance. I think there is an entire week's worth of discussion on that one, but I simply will point out the communal spirit that hopefully attends that meeting. Each person must receive her own individual witness or feel his own individual desire to believe, but the one unifying thing many can share is the communal spirit that should fill our worship service.

Charity Envieth Not: Epic Fail This Week

I don't have any profound thought about charity envying not from my week - other than that it's a really hard standard to learn and practice fully. I have to admit I failed miserably this week wtih at least one situation, and I'm still trying to accept everything, let it go and not dwell negatively on it. What I will pass on is simple and probably obvious, but it's what struck me today as I took time to reflect on the experience in light of my New Year's Resolution focus this month:

It's really hard to be charitable and "envy not" when you accept responsibility for your own mistakes and watch others not do so for theirs - especially when their mistakes get blamed on you.

I have fought the frustration that accompanies such situations all week. I have admitted and accepted my own incorrect actions, but I have struggled to not "envy" someone else's situation - since I am paying for both my own error and those of the other person. Not only did I naturally want to trade places to some degree (envying the other's lack of accountability), but I also naturally found myself fighting feelings of hoping the other person was exposed for not being willing to admit and accept what was done to influence my situation.

I am coming to the conclusion that the only way I can let go of this and put it totally behind me, knowing the overall issue will not change, is to try to be charitable in my view of others, not have unrealistic expectations (not expect more of someone than they are able to do, just as I hope others don't hold me to an unrealistic standard) and realize that, in the end, I am as much to blame as anyone else.

In one way, at least, my focus (my resolution) this month helped - since it forced me to be more directly aware of my emotional reaction and gave me a way to work immediately on fighting my natural reaction. In another way, however, it reiterated a great, core principle of the Gospel of Jesus Christ - that every single one of us is a sinner and needs to be redeemed, even those of us who are striving with all our might to become more Christ-like each and every day. In that arena, at least, I am no better than anyone else - even those toward whom I struggle to exercise charity and whom I strive to envy not.

For that reminder, I am grateful.

Rambling Frustrated Thoughts on Motherhood

"What I’m really struggling with is how what I’m sacrificing is benefiting human kind. How what I am doing (full-time mothering) matters, especially if it only serves to provide the next generation of women to do the exact same thing. I guess I didn’t express that so well."

I think you have expressed yourself very well — it’s just easiest to respond to a slightly different question than the one you’re wondering about.

Millions upon millions of mothers have done some variation of what you’re doing, and God willing, millions more, including your daughter, will do it in the future. What any individual mother does may not benefit human kind in a monumental way, but that’s not the role of mothering. Each of us experiences mortality only once, and each of us needs a mother, or someone else in that role, and each of us experiences the benefits of being the child of a good mother individually regardless of how many millions of others have the same need. That is, it is irrelevant to your children that you are one of many millions — you are THEIR mother, raising THEM, and that’s the whole world to them.

Even so, I’m not convinced that your individual good mothering, including the drudgery, is of use to your family alone. I have a stake in this world, too, and the quality of my life, and the life of everybody else, depends in part on the fact that millions of mothers have raised their children to pick up their socks, avoid breaking eggs in anybody’s bed, and in general to function in society. I need doctors and clerks and policemen and seamstresses and bus drivers and plumbers; I need overwhelming numbers of people around me who have been raised not to rob or murder me, who have been taught to call 911 if I have an accident, who will cooperate with me in electing good leaders and financing clean water delivery systems, and who will drive on the right side of the road and stop at crosswalks.

I guess what I’m trying to say in brief is that what you are doing leads to everything good within the walls of your own home, and contributes to human kind in ways that are obvious and yet so subtle that you aren’t even aware of them. At least you’re not aware of them in those moments when you’re teaching your children not to tie your tights to the bedposts.

Comment #39 by Ardis Parshall - Rambling Frustrated Thoughts on Motherhood (By Common Consent)

The Beauty and Power of a Joyful Noise

The Arlington Ward Priesthood in Boston in the late 80's - early 90's had an amazing men's chorus. The sisters used to delay starting RS until after the a cappella hymn in PH opening exercises was done, just so they could listen to the men sing. We had every part covered, with 3 or 4 brethren improvising different parts each verse. It was an amazing experience to have the brethren be so much more musically gifted than the sisters, who were quite good in their own right.

My first church solo was at my cousin's missionary farewell; I was six-years-old. It's been probably about 5 years since my last solo in church. That's the worst part of my callings over the last few years. Nobody thinks of asking me to sing other than in the choir. I think they just assume I'm too busy - or that I am at the pulpit enough already.

Otoh, I've been in small branches and groups (and an occasional ward) where I felt like I was singing a solo - and my kids have mentioned numerous times that they also feel like I am singing a solo. I don't do quiet singing.

With all of that background, my favorite musical experiences at church have been: 1) sitting next to a bishop who couldn't carry a tune in a bucket but sang with all his heart, nevertheless; 2) singing in a ward choir with a sister who was totally tone deaf, knew it, but still loved music enough to want to praise God through song.

Truly, there is power and beauty in making a joyful noise unto the Lord.

Kissing God Good Night

Comment by "back&then" on "My Struggle with Formal Prayers" (This Blog - Feb. 14, 2009)

It is kind of like living in your parents home. They know you love them, they know you communicate with them, they know you, it is ok. They don't need evidence of your affection.

In France we "kiss good morning" members of our family as well as we "kiss good night" before we go in our bedroom. This is right before we go in our bedroom for good and we don't intend to come back in the living room or the kitchen, a way to say "you won't see me until tomorrow". Not doing it is perceived as being either rude or weird or heartless (unless you really don't do it in your family which may happen) and I see formal prayers as a way to "kiss good morning/good night" our Heavenly Father. It does not mean that I am not going to communicate all day long with Him, it does not mean that I am not going to think of Him. It is a way to show my affection because I take one minute of my time that is 100% for Him and nobody else. The world may explode I am not going to stop my prayer like when you hug someone, you only hug this person.

It is also a time for me to turn to him 100% even if it is to say "dear HF. Too tired tonight. Can't think straight. In the name of J.C, Amen" and having to turn to Him, having to "face Him" in the only way we can "afford" right now on earth forces me to keep myself in check not in the big things (this is easy to do) but in the little ones such as my mood or the spirit I am in.

I see formal prayer also as a way of being polite with God not in a distant way but in a way that shows the respect and gratitude I have for Him and therefore the respect I have for my own divine nature.

Socio-Economic Status and the LDS Church

There is a fascinating paradox within Mormonism. There is the general perception among many that this church caters to the poor and uneducated and ignorant and desperate. In fact, if you ask members themselves to identify the "best potential converts", I would be willing to bet that many would identify exactly this group - the poor, humbled ones.

Contrast that with the actual demographic descriptions that often are published in comparative studies of various religions. In all of them I have seen, members of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints are aggregated as (among, at least) the most educated believers in the world - with a standard of living that also is near or at the top of the lists.

The question in my mind that rarely is discussed or addressed in these studies is whether both of these seemingly opposing claims are true - that the nature of the Gospel that we teach appeals to the poor and oppressed initially and then, in very real and practical terms, inspires and motivates and literally "empowers" those who stick with it to raise their education and/or standard of living - if not with the initial converts, then at least with their children. I suspect the "middle class" perception of the Church from the outside is a result more of this growth from generation to generation (how 2nd and 3rd generation Mormons appear and live) than it is to the status of converts when they first join the Church.

In that sense, if those around them tend to remain in poverty while Mormons (outside of America) tend to raise their standard of living in ways measurably different than those around them, then perhaps that contributes to the impression that these Mormons are more "American" than "native" - simply because they act and dress and carry themselves more "middle-class" than their friends and neighbors. (Fwiw, I have heard critics say that converts in poorer countries join the Church simply to "get a better education and make more money". How's that for a warped criticism - whether it's true or not?)

It would be an interesting way to explain the oddity that those in developing countries who become established in Mormon culture tend to raise their standard of living relatively high enough to have excess within their culture, while those who have enjoyed multi-generational prosperity tend to succumb more to the allure of their prosperity, over-extend and lose it. (Sounds like I'm paraphrasing the Book of Mormon, doesn't it?)

There is a good spiritual lesson in there for anyone who wants to look for it.

A Tribute to Charity: My Father Had a Stroke This Week

My father had a stroke on Wednesday. The artery in his neck is 95% blocked, and he will have surgery to try to correct that problem next Wednesday. Since my New Year's Resolution posts this month are focused on charity envying not, I want to repost something that I wrote a little over two years ago when one of my nieces died unexpectedly.

Much of what I know of charity envying not (and charity in totality) was learned by watching my father - particularly as he laid down his own life for the woman he loves. He never once begrudged what he might have had, but rather did what it took to serve his family and others in his own, individual, consciously chosen path. I hope someday I will be as good a man as he is.

Here is an edited version of what I wrote in November of 2007:

My father called this morning to tell us that my niece had died.

My father’s words to us were concise. He is not given to emotional displays, and his natural stoicism was evident in his call. He said two things: “Treasure your children every day of your lives,” and “Keep animals out of your house.” I was struck by how this conversation with my father encapsulated him so perfectly. To understand this, you need to know my father.

My mom has a rare form of schizophrenia. My father was unaware of this, as was everyone else (including my mother), when they got married. He found out after the birth of my sisters (twins), when she was overwhelmed and her mind wouldn’t shut down and allow her to sleep. She had what was termed a nervous breakdown, which led to her clinical diagnosis.

From that moment forward, my dad shielded my mom from every care of the world so her condition would stay in remission, if you will. By all practical measures, he became my father and my mother. My mom wanted more children, so he agreed - knowing that meant his responsibilities would increase accordingly. He shouldered all of the financial, household, emotional, physical, disciplinary, organizational, educational, etc. responsibilities for his family and allowed his wife to be seen by the community as the incredibly spiritual woman we knew as our mother - a modern Mormon saint. People in town admired his work ethic, but they never realized what he was doing behind our doors - because he never once mentioned it in any way to anyone.

Until her first breakdown, my father served in various leadership positions in the Church - for example, serving in a Bishopric before the age of 30. After that, he literally laid down the life he had been pursuing and focused on serving my mother. He waited nearly 30 years to serve in another position that required he spend significant time away from home - until his children were gone and my mom could function without the stress associated with raising them. He left an extremely well paying job with incredible advancement opportunities to go back to the small town where my mom was raised, simply to ease her stress and allow her to function normally. He became an elementary school janitor for over 20 years, took a 50% pay cut and focused on loving and serving his kids - both at home and at his school - in relative poverty.

Not holding a high-profile church position or good-paying job, he came to be known in town as a salt-of-the-earth farm boy - a good man, but certainly not a leader. I bought into that perception until my mother’s second breakdown a few years ago, when her “sleeping pills” stopped working and her whole personality changed. It was only after this experience that I finally saw my father for what he is - as close an example of the Savior’s single-minded dedication to service and family as anyone I have ever known.

(The full post can be read at: http://thingsofmysoul.blogspot.com/2007/10/my-niece-died-this-morning.html)

Today, as I contemplate charity envying not, I think of a man lying in a hospital - robbed of the physical strength and vitality that allowed him to work multiple jobs for years to provide for his familty and allow his beloved to remain at home and undistracted by the real world around her. I spoke with him last night, and the voice I heard was foreign to me. It hit me for the first time in real terms that my father is an old man - and that he now will need to receive the same type of care and attention that he gave so freely for decades.

I love you, Dad - and I will be grateful eternally that I learned at the feet of such a wonderful, Christlike man.

Killing Faith

I have no idea whatsoever if I chose my beliefs or how much control I have over my choices now. I believe I can choose, because I don’t like the alternative - and because I personally feel like I am choosing. What I feel most strongly is that I have made a conscious choice about HOW I reach conclusions - that I sit down, weigh my options, analyze what has brought me joy and decide to make decisions that will enhance and build on that joy. Perhaps that isn’t really a conscious choice; perhaps it simply is part of my inherited, genetic make-up. I don’t worry much about it, since it feels like conscious choice to me.

Having said that, I also believe that one of the greatest fallacies believed and taught by too many members (not by the Church or in the doctrine) is that all people experience the Spirit and construct belief in the same way. We tend to extrapolate the “burning in the bosom and stupor of thought” that was one person’s way of getting spiritual answers to all - which excludes me, since I don’t feel most of my impressions and answers that way. We tend to mis-read Moroni 10:3-5 and assume that ALL investigators and members who read and pray about the Book of Mormon will “know” (generally through a burning in the bosom) that it is true - which excludes many who have a desire to believe and would be wonderful members of the Church but who never join because we tell them they can and should “know” in the same way we know. When we insist that everyone can know, and that they should know, we literally are killing faith.

I understand the tendency to want to see clearly, in black and white. I just don’t like it, because it excludes many people and puts unrealistic expectations on many other people - people who could find great joy and add great worth to the Church without those expectations.

My own summary: Who cares “how” someone comes to believe and/or accept and/or follow? It doesn't matter to me if someone can say, “I know” - or just “I believe” - or just “I want to believe; strengthen my unbelief.” I believe it’s much more complicated for myself than I personally understand, so as long as someone is willing to worship with me, I don’t worry how they got there. I just care that they got there. I’ll let the Lord sort out how much control we all have over our choices, believing that such a determination will be merciful in the end.