In the end, when all is said and done and I stand before God, I believe I will be held accountable for how I lived what I personally believed - and I also believe I am responsible to come to a personal understanding of what I believe. I've stopped caring if I believe exactly what others believe (even the majority of the membership of the Church with regard to some things); I care much more about figuring out what I actually do believe and refining it continually, based on "studying it out in (my) own heart and mind" and on "receiving on-going revelation" (both from God directly and from others whom He has inspired). Revelation to me through someone else ultimately is revelation to me from God.
The principle of "on-going revelation" is important to me - since "revelation", at is core, simply means the uncovering of things that previously were hidden from view. I sustain and support prophets and apostles, and I value their insights and beliefs and perspectives HIGHLY - but, in the end, I believe I'm not going to be judged at the most basic level by how I "obeyed" them. I believe I will be judged by how I obey God - and that is determined almost exclusively by how well I follow my conscience and do my best to understand and internalize what I believe to be the Gospel of Jesus Christ. It is a result of who I am and who I become.
I compromise all the time on lots of practical things as a member of a society (including of the LDS Church and as half of an equal couple), but we are told that the ideal is for all people, as individuals, to be prophets in the purest sense of the word (those to whom God speaks, in whatever way that occurs for each individual) - so that's my primary goal.
Learning to be at peace with that individual journey within my partner-marriage relationship and the collective, communal Church is the key - and most of that peace has come from nothing more than learning to accept my best effort to do and be my best.
The Scream
1 week ago
1 comment:
So very beautiful Ray, thankyou. You have offered me a reflection, and thereby validation, of my own process.
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