Monday, July 5, 2010

Honor Their Wishes. Don't Visit Them.

I was asked once by some ward leaders how they should react to those who request that they not be contacted. My response was simple:

"Honor their wishes. Do not contact them. Send a note to them every 6-12 months asking if they still want to be left alone, and honor whatever their answer is. If they request that their names be removed, take is as your responsibility to see that they are removed. They are adults and responsible for their own interactions with God. Let them make those decisions for themselves."

One of the most ironic things I can imagine is that when those who are assigned to Home Teachers request that they not be contacted, performing Home Teaching according to the
PRINCIPLE of Home Teaching (being willing to do whatever your assigned families want of you) means that you not contact them. That's extremely easy to forget.


Anonymous said...

Our bishop decided to assign all the inactives to home teachers, including those on the do not contact list. Active members were no longer assigned home teachers.

I like your reasoning since I am assigned to contact some on the DNC list. Unfortunately, when my HPGL passed me my list in the hall, he failed to mention that several of the people were DNC, which made it awkward for me.

Matthew said...

Awkward is an understatement. I will never forget calling my new HT family, not knowing that they were DNC, and the gentleman I spoke to was simply irate, and with good reason, as mine was not the first unwanted call he had received.

Whatever the intended outcome was, I simply told my EQP that I would not be calling or visiting this family at all. Respecting the wishes of others is key to our understanding of agency, and it is too often neglected.