Why I Don't Believe in Eternal Gestational Birth

Almost exactly two years ago, I wrote a post titled, "Who Gave Birth to God's Spirit Children?"  I had occasion recently to revisit a post on "Real Intent" titled, "Does Exaltation Mean Polygamy?" - and I added a clarifying comment in that thread to an earlier comment in which I said I was "appalled" by the idea of immortal pregnancy.  I am copying that comment here, along with links to the two posts I mentioned, in the hope that it will help someone understand why I feel so strongly about the belief in eternal gestational birth. 

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It's not the idea that we will be creating life eternally that is appalling; in fact, I love that idea. That concept is one of my favorite in all of Mormon theology.  Eternal motherhood and fatherhood is beautiful and sublime - and, within Christianity, so unique.  To me, it is the very heart of the Restoration - the resurrection, if you will, of a murdered Divine Father and Mother (theologically). 

It's the idea that creating life after mortality will be exactly like it has been for thousands of years on earth that is appalling to me (although understandable, given the inability of people in the past to imagine any other way that life could be created) - and a large part of the revulsion I feel for that idea is the wink, wink way men often talk about only having one child if we had to go through mortal pregnancy and delivery.  We joke about it, but we mean it.  We (men) glamorize it but absolutely don't want to HAVE to go through it, so we are fine and dandy, thank you very much, if they (women) are the ones who GET to go through it there and here.  (Notice the difference in the bolded words; they are instructive to me.) 

I just don't see the creation of immortal spirits as an internal, gestational process that involves "birth" in the way we understand that word here on earth.  It's that concept (eternal, internal conception, gestation and birth) that I find appalling - especially since, generally speaking, men are deeply grateful we don't have to be involved in that process beyond the conception stage.  The fun without the pain vs. (ideally, but not always) the fun and the pain. 

Yeah, I can understand why many men might tend to be totally OK with women giving birth like that forever, but I disagree - passionately.

God Will Reveal Himself to Us in the People around Us

Thoughts on the sacrament, part I: The road to Emmaus - Aaron R. (By Common Consent)

Sweet Bliss: The Importance of Innocence and Child-Like Faith

My second son, Jeff, wrote a poem in high school a few years ago about which I had forgotten, until my mother e-mailed it to me and my siblings.

I talk a lot here about leaving behind childish views and becoming "adults of God" - but this poem is a reminder to me that part of spiritual maturity is regaining a bit of the unobstructed wonder and acceptance of childhood we almost always lose when we move into a world that demands more than just a bit of cynicism and self-protection - that we can't be childish, but we must return to being child-like. I really like the examples Jeff used, since I think they have fascinating symbolic meaning, especially with a religious application.

SWEET BLISS

Childhood is being afraid of the dark . . .
and believing a night light will scare away the monsters.

Childhood is bringing home a wild animal . . .
and asking if you can keep it.

Childhood is digging for worms and fossils . . .
in the playground at school.

Childhood is chasing down the ice cream truck on a hot summer day . . .
no matter how far you have to run to catch it.

Childhood is playing with anyone . . .
and not caring about origin or orientation.

Childhood is . . .
sweet bliss.  

I want to extrapolate a bit on the poem from my own life's perspective:

I am not afraid of the dark . . .

because I have constructed a night light that scares away the monsters.

I am able to entertain thoughts that others see as "wild animals" . . .

because I have had so much practice handling them in a controlled environment and now can handle them on my own.

I like digging for worms (common things) and fossils (hidden things) . . .

even in the most common places where others play without realizing what is all around but unseen by them.

I enjoy chasing down fulfilling things (especially thoughts and concepts), even when it's hot . . .

no matter how far I have to run to catch them.

I find great joy in interacting with and learning from anyone . . .

and not caring about origin, orientation or perspective.

My life is . . .

sweet bliss (because it is uniquely mine).

If You Want to Be a Force for Good at Church: First, Don't Blame Those Who Struggle

There was a discussion in a leadership meeting I attended once that centered on the question of why members left the Church and what we could do about it. I knew how it probably would go naturally, so I piped up right at the beginning and said that most of the people who have left with whom I have talked personally mention being bored and feeling unfed at church - and that the best thing we can do, in my opinion, is to make our services and classes and meetings at all levels and of all kinds more spiritual and more spiritually filling.

Of course, there was an initial, immediate reflection of that onto the people who don't come prepared to feel the Spirit (as if it's their own fault for not feeling fed and feeling bored), but the conversation eventually ended up focusing on the "standard" idea that everyone needs a friend, something to do and nourishment with the good word of God. I agreed and simply pointed out that it is up to the leadership of each ward and branch to set the example of nourishing with the good word of God and insist that the membership do that, as well, to the best of their ability.

This is one issue where I agree completely with the "standard Sunday School answer". Everyone needs a friend (someone with whom s/he can talk honestly and openly without being judged or condemned), something to do (to not feel like a nobody and to serve others) and spiritual nourishment. One is social; the next is active personal; the last is spiritual.

If all three of these things were provided to every member, there still would be issues - but they would be much fewer, far between and less serious. So, my advice to everyone:

If you want to be a force for good at church, be a real friend to someone at church, find something to do at church that is important and meaningful to you (whether that is an official calling or not) and provide nourishment of the good word of God to those who need it (including yourself, if you aren't getting it directly at church as much and as often as you'd like).

Why I Can Say I Know Things I Don't Know Intellectually

I believe in gods, and my absolute favorite aspect of Mormon theology is the concept that "I (and every other person) am a child of God" - that I can be godly - that I can be and become a god.

I believe in God, because I want to believe in God. I believe in Heavenly Parents, because I want to believe in Heavenly Parents.

Do I "know" intellectually that they exist and that what I believe is accurate?

No.

Do I feel deeply that there is great power in the concept and principle and that I have experienced something outside my rational comprehension that I choose to accept and call "God"?

Yes.

Thus, do I feel comfortable in a group of members using the accepted vernacular and saying that, based on my own experiences, I know God lives and loves us?

Yes.

I am comfortable saying it in that setting, even though I explain it differently (more comprehensively) on a site like this where I try to flesh things out and explain in more detail.

I'm fine using shorthand when shorthand is appropriate.

The Gospel Is Simple; Life in a Community Is Not

The Gospel really is simple - not easy, but simple: 

Jesus is the personification of the will of God to allow for the ultimate growth of His children (Atonement); hope for, believe in and act on the promises of the Lord, even if you can't see the results at the time (faith); try to change - both reactively to mistakes you make and proactively to become who you want to become (repent); symbolically participate in a spiritual cleansing ritual (be baptized); "receive" comfort and guidance from God (the gift of the Holy Ghost); rinse and repeat your entire life (endure to the end).

On the other hand, living life amid the necessary rules and regulations of communal living is neither simple nor easy, especially, in the imagery of Joseph B. Wirthlin, for those who play a different instrument than most others in the community and/or hear a counter-melody or harmony most others don't hear. 

Broken-Down Cars. Broken-Down Bodies. Broken-Down Faith.

A friend of mine who was going through a faith reconstruction shared the following with me.  Although it happened in the temple, it is a great reminder that we gather in "wards" because that term describes the geographic nature of our congregations (based on 19th Century political wards), but it also can describe the healing and supporting nature of the work that we are supposed to do (by creating, in practical terms, our own hospital wards at church).

I hope my friend's words help someone, somewhere, who feels, in some way, broken-down.

I went to the temple today. We started almost fifteen minutes late because of some car trouble in a family group. Other people came into the room with walkers, labored breathing and obvious problems moving around. I was thinking, "Great, this is going to go really slowly."

But suddenly it was perfect, all of us there together. Broken-down cars, broken-down bodies, and me with my broken-down faith.

Truly, that is a description of Zion.  

How to Enjoy Church and Grow Personally When You Don't Learn Much while There

I have been asked by more than one person what they can do to enjoy church and feel like they are progressing spiritually at church when they don't feel like they are learning anything new by attending.  

My general advice is:

When you go to church, lay down your life for that short time period and step into Jesus' ministry. Start going primarily to find ways to serve people, not to be instructed. You can get the instruction you need outside of church, so whatever you get in church will be an unexpected bonus. I promise, there are lots of people who need to be served at any given time - at least as many, I'm certain, as need to be taught.

Focus on being the servant first (a savior to others) and be the student whenever that happens naturally.

It really can change the life you lay down when you leave your house each Sunday.

Inclusion vs. Exclusion: Some Things Make Me Want to Scream

I have a friend who told me recently that her Bishop has decided that anyone who is not in the chapel during the administration of the sacrament will not have the sacrament taken to them - that the sacrament will be passed only to people who are in the chapel. 

Some. Things. Make. Me. Want. to. Scream!

My rule for all interaction with anyone is to choose, consciously, to err on the side of charity and inclusion and not on the side of judging and exclusion.  I know I will make mistakes in how I interact with people (and that I will fail to follow my own rule on occasion), and I know others will do the same.  I know that others will make mistakes in how they interact with me.  I accept the simple fact that none of us are infallible - that all will "come short of the glory of God" in this life, and that social, interpersonal relationships are a prime example of how we all fall short.  

However, I also believe deeply that tenderness always is a better reaction than harshness - even when harshness is warranted and even, ultimately, unavoidable.  I believe strongly that it is better - much better - to include rather than exclude.  Sometimes, exclusion becomes necessary - but I believe we tend to exclude too quickly.  I believe that excluding reflexively, broadly and/or collectively, instead of carefully, thoughtfully and/or individually is a natural (wo)man tendency and flat-out wrong - and it is contrary to everything I understand about the Gospel of Jesus Christ. 

Generally, I can see reasons why Bishops and other church leaders might make decisions with which I personally don't agree, and, generally, I can support those leaders even when I disagree with their decisions.  However, denying the sacrament to someone who has made the effort to attend church but is not sitting in the chapel crosses a line that I cannot accept or support.  Not only is it in direct opposition to the standard practice throughout the LDS Church, but it simply is wrong at the most basic, fundamental level. 

I hope my friend's Bishop, who probably is a good, sincere person trying to do the best he can, recognizes the error of his decision and changes this particular decision - and I hope others do not make the same mistake. 

Why Do We Lack Charismatics Like Joseph Smith Now?

I think it's a simple matter of relatively few people being able to be a combination of visionary, charismatic, inspiring and truly innovative theologically (or truly innovative in most other areas). There's a reason there are no other Apples and Microsofts out there in the world. It's also a simple matter of those who are that combination of characteristics generally burning brightly for a time and then being extinguished by those who can't handle the glare and/or flaming out for various reasons.

Think about it for a minute:

How many people who fit that description lived to be old? How many ended up diving completely off the deep end into the dark side? How many were killed just as they were entering chronological maturity?

People generally work hard to contain raging fires - both physical and spiritual / religious. It's just too threatening and unstable for most people to let them burn, and they often use up all the oxygen and fuel available and extinguish themselves.